I read a wonderful talk by Douglas Callister entitled Your Refined Heavenly Home. It touched my heart and made me truly desire for a more refined, beautiful home and an atmosphere that is more heaven-like.
There is one part, however, that I'm troubling over. I've discussed it with my husband, but still cannot find a decision I'm happy with.
"We must not “let ourselves go” and become so casual—even sloppy—in our appearance that we distance ourselves from the beauty heaven has given us. Every man has the right to be married to a woman who makes herself as beautiful as she can be and who looks in the mirror to tidy herself up before he comes home. Every woman has a right to be married to a man who keeps himself clean, physically as well as morally, and takes pride in his appearance."
So, I'm guilty of "letting myself go". I have long hair that I wear in a ponytail or bun every day. I wear jeans and t-shirt and am more than a few pounds overweight. But I've decided I want to change. For myself.
Every day I'm trying to do something to make myself more "beautiful" physically. The other day I plucked my eyebrows. Because I'm so loving, I won't include a picture of what they looked like before. I'm also trying to wash my face and use good products to help my skin look more attractive. And exercise is going to be my new best friend.
I'm trying. I want to be a refined woman. I want to feel like the daughter of God I know I am.
As I was discussing this with my husband, I asked for his definition of womanly beauty. I wanted to know if it was "beautiful" to have a nice haircut, to wear neat and comely clothes, have lovely skin and be in shape. Or did make-up need to be involved? I'm not against make-up. I actually have a lot of it (my sister-in-law is a Mary Kay consultant and I personally keep her in business). But I don't have a lot of time and energy to use it right now.
Since my time is limited I wanted to know if using the 15 to 20 minutes it takes each day to put on make-up would be better used in exercising so that I am healthy and have a lovely girlish figure. He replied that I should be able to do it all - exercise, fix my hair and wear make-up and that without the make-up it wouldn't be considered "beautiful".
I'll be honest and say that I ended up raising my voice at this point. A part of me chafes that for a woman to be beautiful she must wear make-up. A man is considered handsome without it. Part of me is unhappy that I can't be considered "naturally cute" or whatever. It's sort of like I'm not good enough unless I have it. I should probably let you know that my husband is a wonderful man, and regularly tells me he loves me and that I'm beautiful. In fact his nickname for me is "Pretty". But it still bothered me.
Can women be "beautiful" without make-up? Can a well-dressed, physically fit, smiling woman be considered beautiful? Has our society so indoctrinated us with artificial beauty that we can no longer appreciate natural beauty? Or is all the make-up actually a part of refinement and loveliness?